Disclaimer: These are my thoughts as a layman. I have no psychology qualifications.
The English language gained the word ‘ego’ when Freud’s translator didn’t translate the German ‘ich’ into the English ‘I’, using a Greek word instead. In the process some of the simplicity of Freud’s theory was lost.
When we say someone has a huge ego, are we saying they have a huge ‘I’, a huge sense of self? I propose the opposite: we are observing someone with a small or weak sense of self. Someone who is desperately trying to gain a sense of self, of being seen, even of existing.
Narcissists are usually seen as people who have excessive self love. I’d like to propose that we are actually observing someone who hates their authentic self and who has created a false persona which they try to project into the world. “Lack of authenticity is a fear response” [Miki Kashtan, my paraphrase]. Tragically, they gain no satisfaction if they succeed in this projection as what others encounter is the fake persona, not the authentic self.
Narcissists and people with huge egos are pitiful creatures doomed to a life of misery no matter what their achievements. They would surely benefit from professional help. It would be a great idea if we never again elect them Prime Minister or President.